Tears of Frustration, Tears of Peace

Today, I wanted to cry. In fact, I did cry! In our Primary Congregation, we have nearly 200 kids. They are divided up into to groups: Junior and Senior Primary. Like the other choristers around the world, I had this beautiful plan in place to read a quote by my uncle, Elder L. Tom Perry, about singing a song from the top of our lungs. I finished up our regular song practice with our younger kids and pulled out pictures of a man many recognized, Elder Perry. Regardless of how I tried, the talking would not stop. There were kids climbing over kids, kids playing with their neighbor, kids practicing dance moves.... none of us adults could get them to calm down! Over 50 kids ages 3-6 and they were.... exhausting!! I was working hard to make the moment special, to tell them from a personal point of view how it felt to know this man on a personal level, and nothing worked. Teachers were practically sitting on their students to get them to settle down. We had done everything up to this point, including wiggle songs, whispering, talking loudly, having them stand to sing... 

NOTHING. WORKED. Trying to get through my assigned time, I hastily finished my lesson, telling the next teacher (a member of our bishopric, or a clergyman), "Good luck,"collected my teaching items, then returned to my seat. Things did not go much better for him, as all of the children (who usually are very well behaved) decided that today was the day they would be, well.... kids! (What are they thinking?!) >wink<

While the room was switching to the older kids (ages 7-11), I stood at the piano, my back turned to everyone, and closed my eyes. As I fought tears of frustration, I offered up a prayer that went something like this: Oh Uncle Tom, I am so sorry! This was supposed to be a special tribute for you, and it turned into a hot mess. I have let you down. I am so very sorry. 

As soon as I thought those words, I felt his response of laughing. Laughing! Of all the nerve, why would he laugh at me when I was trying so hard to do something for him?! I felt a whisper from heaven tell me: Young Lady, >laugh< they are kids! Enjoy them! 

Well! I'll tell you what I did! I.... sighed. He was right. They were little kids and probably busting at the seams with the break of rainy weather and beautiful sun shining. I would be too! 

As I turned to welcome the older kids with a song, they immediately settled in their chairs, becoming reverent. All of us leaders were ever so grateful. one of them quickly commented that they were a breath of fresh air. When it was time to pay tribute, these children listened wholeheartedly as I shared stories of my relationship with someone incredibly special. I bore witness that as we sang, the Holy Ghost would let them know if the message of the song held eternal truths, as my uncle taught. It was beautiful and moving as they did indeed sing "from the top of their lungs with enthusiasm." How I rejoiced in that moment in knowing that he could hear us from heaven.

I did not video these students of mine, but other choristers around the world recorded their primaries. One local Portuguese Branch song leader sent me a video of his children singing in their native language. I was moved to tears as these children paid tribute to such a revered man. What a kind service! How grateful I am to be part of such an organization that teaches truths such as "Families can be together forever." How grateful I am for this message being my uncle's legacy. 

Singing with enthusiasm, 

Mama Dragon

Entitled...

For the first time in their lives, I just asked my kids to help pitch in for our family's financial needs. For the most part, our children have always paid their own way. We provide for their needs, they provide for their wants. It is a great honor system we have set in place, following generations of teaching kids the value of hard work. I explained to them that for centuries, families have worked together to sustain their needs. It seems to be only in this last generation that kids have developed a sense of entitlement and think everything should be handed to them. This, I believe, is not a healthy attitude. As we brainstorm ideas on what we can do as a family to earn money together, the sense of entitlement seems to dissipate. 

When I was a kid, we lived in the most humble of circumstances. (We were city dwellers, so I do not have any farm stories.) My dad worked as a brick mason, and had a furniture business (restoring and repairing) as well as a landscaping business on the side. My mother always took in sewing and provided simple but elegant wedding services to people who could not afford glamorous events. As a family, we collected cans and newspapers and recycled them, earning money for that. (I do not think there are still newspaper recycling services that pay money, but scrap metal is a big business.) We also stuffed envelopes, cleaned office buildings, and had kool-aid stands. It was an honor to help provide for our needs and we gained the experience of work. We did not always do it with a good attitude, but for some of us, if it was important to our parents, it was important to us. We were not handed everything, simply because we could not afford it. If we wanted a new bike, we got a pepr route to earn the money. If we wanted money for the concession stand at the pool or baseball field, we mowed lawns or babysat, or did extra chores for our mom. Money was tight, yet we found a way. 

Thankfully, my children area understanding that if they want something of value, they need to work for it. Recently, my 16 year old decided he wanted to purchase a laptop. Through his school program, he was given an allowance to buy one, but that one was losing life after a few years of continual use. Being the computer geek he is, a new laptop would be wonderful. He spent weeks researching his options and finally decided on one that would cost about $500. He sought out employment and landed a job that would allow him to earn enough money so in a matter of three months he could make his purchase. When he was less than $100 from his goal, he found out he did not have to work for the next two weeks. Disappointment only stuck for a moment, as he said aloud, "I am close to my goal. I am going to put it out there that I am looking for babysitting jobs so I can earn the rest of my money and make my purchase." Two hours later, he had a few babysitting jobs lined up for that week- paying enough to meet his goal. He loves his new treasure and takes great care of the object he worked so hard to earn. 

from lds.org

What if we want a new (to us) item and cannot afford it? Sometimes, we learn the hard way and borrow money to make the purchase. As often as I can, I encourage my children to not go this route. Borrowing often gets people into financial trouble. Work for it! Save for it! Or.... do without it! You will be happier and have a better peace of mind if you are focusing your efforts on meeting your goals rather than keeping up with what the next-door neighbors are doing. 

We work hard to teach our kids that are entitled- as long as they do the work and earn the money. How grateful I am for the heritage I am a part of, one that has taught me the value of hard work! How grateful I am to have the honor to righteously teach my children to work hard to meet their goals. Working as a family entitles us peace and joy that the world does not have to offer. 

Working hard-

Mama Dragon

Prayers of Love

Yesterday, even before I wrote about my beloved uncle, I had received an outpouring of love from many friends who know of our relationship and heard of his illness. After I posted, I had a breakdown, because I almost could not handle the amount of love that came from all levels of relationships. I know that he feels your prayers and we are all grateful for them. 

Many times in my life I have had people ask "what can I do?" for someone that is in need. Since we are all made in our Father's image, does it seem so foreign that we should want to reach out to others, to lighten their loads, bring them comfort when they are struggling? Reaching out to another should not be a completely new concept. It is instilled with in us when we are created. There have been very few times in my life that I have ever met a truly selfish person. Almost everyone I know wants to lift others. I will share with you the one act of service that I have personal knowledge of saving lives: Prayers.

Prayers are the link between us and heaven. It is how we commune with the angels, and with God. Time and time again I have seen prayers literally pull someone from darkness back into light. I have seen countenances change from anguished to peaceful as they feel the prayers of others carry them through difficulties. When we are praying for someone else, we are serving them, and through service, we are showing them love.

There are many points on the spectrum of peace. It is up to us as individuals to allow ourselves to feel it, regardless of the circumstances. Will you be one who accepts the prayers on your behalf without expecting more, allowing yourself to be a recipient of the peace and blessings that come through those prayers? Or, will you be one who expects more- more time, more energy, more money, more anything from others- because their prayers are not enough to satisfy your hurting soul? 

Sometimes, many times, all we have to offer are prayers. Do not feel bad or guilty over this! Prayers are beautiful, needed, and bring light to this world! Each of us have our own lives to live and often times our own plates are so full we just have nothing else to give. Even Christ came to this point in His life, when He suffered in the Garden of Gethsemane, and finally when He died upon the cross. He had no more to offer the children of the world, but His prayers. Yet, is was because of those prayers and we are redeemed, saved by Him!

Photo courtesy of: lds.org

When we serve another, we are showing them love. At this time, as my family prepares to bid a mortal farewell to our beloved uncle and head of our family, your prayers- your love- are appreciated. Thank you for that. Thank you for your love. May the blessings of heaven fall upon each of you as you reach out to another in need.

Faithfully praying for you-
Mama Dragon