Balancing Act

Do you remember as a kid, you would stand on one foot and try to hop without falling over? Do you recall using the cracks on the sidewalk and pretend it was a tight rope? These acts of balancing were symbolic for what was to come in our adult lives: finding balance. 

On a regular basis, I get asked "How do you do it all?" This is in regards to homeschooling, canning, writing music, serving my neighbor.... etc. Here are a few things that those in front of the scene do not realize is going on behind the scenes... I don't. Just like our invisible tight ropes, life is a balancing act. Each of us has to find our point of balance and it will never be the same as another's. 

When my husband and I were newlyweds, we decided that for the time being, I would work outside the home. Eventually, we wanted me to be home with our children. I worked up until my 6th month of pregnancy with our first baby, which was miraculous in itself, because of so many complications. When he was a couple of months old, we decided I was going to return to work for the time being, to lighten my husband's load. He was in school full time, working a full and part time job, and not getting more than a wink of sleep each night. In me returning to work, he was able to decrease his load somewhat when he left one of his jobs. I was blessed in finding a job that allowed me to take my baby with me. 

When Eldest reached about 6 months old, I remember hearing one of my church leaders speak about motherhood in our semi-annual church conference. He explained that God's desire for families was to have mothers be the nurturers of the home, and if she was able, the mother should be home with the children. We took that seriously and after consulting the Lord in prayer, I left my job and came home- permanently. 

Eldest is now preparing to graduate from high school in a few weeks and I have been blessed to be a stay-at-home-mom these 17 years to our four children. It has not been easy financially, nor always emotionally, but it has been worth it. 

My balancing act comes in the form of being a SAHM. I do not "do it all" but as a SAHM, part of my responsibilities are to help us be financially frugal (I do not clip coupons, just FYI), see that my children are getting a proper education (two kids are homeschooled, two are in public school), and raise them up in righteousness (I'm a Mama Dragon). I write music when the Lord inspires me to but it is currently not my full-time occupation. (The past two years, I have hardly touched music because I went through a health crisis and my family also needed me to focus on them.) Why wouldn't I do all of these things? They are part of who I am, and who I care to be. I do not let any one area rule my entire time so in them, I am able to find balance. 

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When we are following our own path, finding our own balance, there are no absolute rules. In my church, there are guidelines, but things can be adjusted to individual needs. Each of us has multiple responsibilities- be it family, job, church, community service opportunities, etc. We each do what we need to do in order to find balance. The key is to not let any one area take over our entire existence. The key is to stay upright so that we do not fall. 

When a gymnast trains, they do not learn only the balance beam, or only the parallel bars, or only the rings. they learn each area of the gym. As they train, they may find they are stronger on one event than another, but they still remain a sense of balance so they can perform in each area.  That is how we should balance our lives! 

Make a list of all the areas you have a responsibility: home (meal planning, cleaning, helping with homework), work outside the home, church and community, hobbies. Then, prioritize your list. In my life, it is God, Family (including time for myself), Church, everything else (which changes according to seasons of my life). Take some time to really think through these areas and create your own gymnastics routine. One key to this is learning it is absolutely alright to say NO! This took me a very long time to figure out, but when I mastered it, my life became bearable, and breathable. Perhaps you need to cut out social media time in order to plan menus. Maybe you need to give a little more responsibilities to your growing children in order to have time to play the piano once in a while. Instead of being PTA president, maybe you can just be a member! I cannot do it all! I don't do it all! I have to honor the no's in order to make room for the yes's. 

When I am on the balance beam (figuratively), I cannot do rings, vault, or unevens. I can, however, adjust my time at the gym in order to accommodate all the areas I do need to practice and have a successful dismount in the end. Life is a balancing act. Adjust your routine as needed, for when you find balance, you find peace. 

Balancing the world- 

Mama Dragon